I have been writing, rewriting and editing this for a while, knowing what I want to say or rather what I want to hear or read but I haven’t really known how to start. Maybe it’s that I doubted that I should be the one to write it. But, why shouldn’t I be the one to write it? This is meant as much for me as it is for you. While I sincerely hope that this speaks to you and encourages you in someway, it’s also meant as a reminder and encouragement to me. To know and believe that I am enough.
Why is it that we struggle with the concept of enough? Not just having enough, but being enough. How is it that we ever even came to the idea that we weren’t enough?
I caught the last little bit of the movie “Pretty in Pink” on tv last night and in the few minutes that I watched it was glaringly obvious that Molly Ringwalds character, Andie, struggled with self esteem issues. I never realized that when I was younger. Andie, seemed so confident and cool. She came from the wrong side of the tracks, she dressed differently and had different friends. I’m sure if you’ve seen this iconic 80s movie you’ll remember that this caused tension and the demise of her relationship with Blane. In the end she decides to go to prom by herself to prove to herself and everyone else that she can. When she encounters Blane at prom, he says he always believed in her, it was her that didn’t believe in him. I love that he always believed in her, but I do think he got something wrong. It wasn’t that she didn’t believe in him, but that she didn’t believe in herself. She didn’t believe she was enough.
I know that Andie is not a real person, she is a fictional movie character, but she like most of us struggle with a lack of confidence. She masks it very well in the movie, she seems brave in the way she dresses differently and has different interests than most of her peers. As viewers we are cheering her on because of her differences. We know that where she lives or how she dresses doesn’t mean that she can’t have the boy, in fact its the very reason we are cheering her on, it’s the reason we want her to get the boy in the end. As viewers we not only believe but we know that Andie is enough.
Here we are back in the reality of our own lives, not living in an 80’s movie where the side of the tracks that you live on determine your worth. We are grown up and instead of tracks we have social media. I don’t believe our self esteem issues started with social media, I believe that we’ve grown up with them, they are somehow inherent to women (though men have confidence problems too), but I do believe social media has exacerbated them. We are in a constant state of comparison and striving for perfection. We see other peoples insta perfect lives and we feel like we don’t measure up.
Why are we comparing ourselves to others? Why are we constantly striving for perfection? Why don’t we feel like we are enough? We are in a constant hustle to keep up, to have it all, do it all, to measure up. And, If we don’t, the shame and condemnation can just about bury us. If it’s not someone else pointing out our inadequacies we will jump right in and do it to ourselves, only louder and meaner than anyone else would.
it’s time to say ENOUGH!
Enough negative self talk.
Enough judgement (for ourselves and others).
Enough fear and anxiety.
Enough self doubt.
It’s time to stop the narrative of not being enough.
You are exactly who you are supposed to be, just the way you are with all the unique and individual characteristics that make you, you. Never before and never again will there be someone that is exactly and perfectly you, with your mix of humor, hope, compassion, drive and the thousand other qualities that make you uniquely you. The world needs you as you are. The world doesn’t need another Beyonce, Oprah or Chip and Joanna (or whoever else you follow on IG). We already have them, they are great, but so are YOU. You are here in this time, this place, with the dreams and talents that you have for a reason, so, be you.
You are enough. In fact, you are the only one that is enough to be the you that you were created to be. Let that soak in for a moment… I’ll say it again, YOU are the only one that is enough to be the you that you were created to be. believe it, know it, walk in it. Now, say it with me “I. Am. Enough!” How does that feel?
“You are enough, not because you did or said or thought or bought or became or created something special but because you always were” – author unknown
YOU. ARE. ENOUGH!